Imagine being a child and not being able to sleep for days. Imagine being terrified of being alone with your thoughts. Imagine drinking yourself into oblivion just to get through the day. Imagine dragging a blade across your arm, only to cut so deep you had to be hospitalized for a suicide attempt.
Unfortunately, many of you may have actually experienced these events first-hand. Some of you may have experienced more than one. Marya Hornbacher experienced them all, and more.
Marya Hornbacher is a thirty-something who was not diagnosed with bipolar disorder until her twenties, though she had a history of serious symptoms since childhood. She chronicles her pursuit of optimum mental health in Madness.
In her book, she details the dark, sleepless nights she had as a child which would usually end in violent sobs and rivers of tears as her mother tried her best to comfort her. In her teens, while battling an eating disorder, she was diagnosed with depression and placed on an SSRI (a type of anti-depressant which targets the serotonin levels in your brain), which she later found out would send her into severe mania. Her manic episodes would usually consist of excessive spending, risky sexual behavior and heavy alcohol consumption. At the end of her mania, she would sink into a deep depression, sending her into psychiatric hospitals on several occassions.
The book is a brutal account of a severe mental illness and its effects on a highly intelligent and creative woman. At times it was dark and disturbing. Other times it was confusing. But, overall, it provided a great insight into the realities of mental illness, good psychiatric care and the value of a positive support system.
**A big thank you to my husband for buying this book for me!**
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